March 09, 2023

I love America, I want strong rights for the working class, and I'm in favor of enough socialized services to make government worth having at all. Just like I love Jesus but I hate the Spanish inquisition, maybe your modern types of Nazism can work out well if you bring them in love ☺ ♥♥♥

March 08, 2023

To avert another civil war in the United States over the same old tired old issues, both sides need to change their ways where they are in the wrong. The thirteenth amendment of our constitution abolished slavery except as punishment for a crime. I'm impartial on this issue. Should criminals be treated as slaves? People who have been to prison appreciate the opportunity to work a bit just to get out of their cells. The blue side continues to pump out propaganda including a message that being a criminal is sort of cool. The red side continues to build more prisons. Both sides need to stop investing in the prison economy, or it will mean another civil war over the same old tired old issues. Propaganda should be carefully thought about and made to uplift the people and bring them together on issues that are good for all of us.

March 05, 2023

I need a good way to remember I have schizophrenia. This disorder does not mix well with software debugging because everything glows and is the CIA. I know a lot of normal people who do this too. I'm not hacking you, I am also being hacked by the imaginary CIA. However, we actually all have schizophrenia. So don't worry about that. I'm going to level with you though, we're pretty much boned. The CIA also has schizophrenia.

February 24, 2023

The best mistake I ever made in life was dropping out in 9th grade and going to community college instead.

I wasn't expelled, it was mutual. My teacher was a lesbian who never forgave me for accidentally calling her "sir." Her teacher's pet was a friend of mine, a buff gay kid who dateraped me and went on to pursue a successful career as a mental health professional. He never forgave me for smoking so much of his weed and never bringing any of my own to share.

Hip hop made me read books.

I feel weird again, like I'm about to fucking blog or something. God Bless America.

January 17, 2023

While you're making life choices for yourself, remember that being a criminal as seen on TV is "cool," they keep building more and more prison cells, and in school they teach us slavery was abolished. The 13th amendment actually reads that slavery can only be punishment for a crime in the US. So, being a criminal is a "cool" career choice to a lot of young people who get the "privilege" to work for 23 cents an hour in prison if they get work detail. Welcome to America.

January 13, 2023

Religions are a cybernetic family tree of human beings trying to find reasons to treat each other well and answers to where we come from, where we are, and where we go. It's so hard to treat each other well sometimes. If humanity dies in a final senseless battle, Fyodorov's heaven dies with us.

January 07, 2023

Just imagine what kinds of telecommunications technologies will contribute to mental illness in 100 years.

January 06, 2023

Since I first made this blog, I've been going through a long period of change. Giving up the weed and beer was only the start of it all. The world of pain I always ran from to getting high was still there, as complicated as ever, made worse by the fact I was stoned for so long. It's hard to navigate the interpersonal bullshit. I sometimes start to sink into feeling like I was better off smoking weed and keeping to myself on purpose, but I really wasn't. The world is just complicated. So many people have slowed down to turn around and help me out with my weird problems, I don't want to turn around and be a jerk. I really want to keep doing what I'm doing these days, better and better.

January 05, 2023


I'm mostly in charge of myself and two cats, and we're all doing well here. Recently my friend said, "you can't really blame those guys who kill a bunch of people and then themselves because people suck so much," and I agreed with him. He was just playing devil's advocate and said, "no, it is their fault." He was completely correct. Those are pretty much the people who suck the most. I sometimes felt like I was somehow better because I would pretty much only kill myself. That would be my choice, though. Accountability is a good topic. When should I be held accountable, and for what? When should I hold other people accountable?

January 04, 2023

Finally, a happy blog post

It's been almost two and a half years since I've had a drink or smoked weed. Life has slowly been getting better and better. Some days have sucked, I'm not going to lie to you. People really gather around to punish people for being different. That's why I always ran to drugs, and I don't anymore. Those people are still there. This world is a cruel circus that I already left on purpose. Now I'm back, and I'm the main attraction. Since you all seem to think I asked you here, I'm going to tell you losers my story. Actually, no I'm not. I'm just going to blog.

My life is amazing today. I'm clearly starting a doodling business online, and I'm getting all my ducks in a row. There are still people on a "that guy sucks" bandwagon, and it's slowly become a worse and worse strategic disadvantage for this.

I found out I absorb people's traumas in weird ways. I love myself so much right now. I didn't get what was all going on. I love myself enough now to quit a job at a hostile workplace. There's no need to eat anyone for their cannibalistic traits in Corporate America. That would make me just as bad right? I'm starting to understand where people are coming from. Everyone slowed down to help me out with my weird problems, I'm going to do my best to show the same compassion to others. If you kill yourself that's totally on you, sorry. I can try to be kind if you want a loose facsimile of a friend.

I honestly still dislike this world though. The loser wins again. Death to the opponent. Oops that's me doing it then. I'm starting to get the hang of this. Go enjoy your life somewhere else ♥